30 Minute Departure Routine for Manny

I could not send him to school today. Last night, we heard him on the monitor--periodic and dry cough. This morning I responded with wild anger to his dawdling. He woke up tired, fitful and sensitive. When we are getting ready to get out the door, I feel like it is God's exercise in stretching my patience. I see him yoga-style, gently pushing my back down to get a deeper stretch, to get me to feel my human limit. Sometimes, I can manage to get a little creative, to flex with my little preschoolers and toddler. Sometimes, however, I snap and clench my jaw and raise my voice to levels I am ashamed to admit.

This morning was a snap-morning, so much that when the boys' ride arrived, Manny was convulsing from being disciplined and in no emotional state to be at school. I spent the morning trying to read to him, to give him snacks, listen to his inventions and hydrate him. My additional penance is this list for a half-hour window before door-time:

1. Begin by saying, "It's time to start preparing to leave for school. Here's a 'SAVE' sign for your invention or here's where you can find a box to save your game. "
2. Have socks, shoes and backpack ready on lower steps.
3. "Honey, please make your way up to the third floor for peeing and teeth-brushing."
4. "Did you do it? Do you need help?"
5. Allow him 5 minutes. Be wiling to help him not just bark at him.
6. If he's doing it say, "Great work. Meet me at the bottom step."
7. While helping with shoes, ask if he needs a drink.
8. Once shoes and coat are on ask if there is a book or toy he'd like to bring along.
9. Immediately enlist him as support for his sibs. Praise him lavishly for his timeliness.
(If Manny and Benici have a conflict during any of these steps, gently urge them of how much time they have spent arguing. Don't intervene. Consequences for fighting will be privilege suspension.)